Series: Close Your Eyes (in progress)
Chapter: Insomnia (part II) (part I)
Timeline: around a year after the formation of the team
Pairing/Characters: Mitchell/Sheppard/Weir...of a sort.
Summary: Elizabeth and John attempt to form a mental connection strong enough to let them carry out the mission and find themselves with more than they bargained for.
Spoilers: None (plays in the AU)
Notes: irony_rocks betaed the hell out of this and is absolutely fabulous for doing so. It would be a confusing mess on my hardrive without her. Any mistakes/weirdness left is 100% mine.
The headache behind her eyes pounded like a living thing as it lanced through her skull. Special Agent Elizabeth Weir’s eyes snapped open and she forgot to feel herself. She was power. Not strong or invincible as she'd expected, but power itself transmuted into physical form. John's muscles - her muscles - tensed and the transformation teased her just beneath the surface of his control.
Sitting directly across from her, John was so close she could have leaned forward and kissed him in the empty cargo hold. In slow motion she watched his irises split and begin to change. A cold shiver ran up her back as she watched through his eyes as fear and astonishment ran over her face. It was more intimate than a mirror. Her lips parted and she gasped as she watched John's hand – no, her hand - shoot up and grab her chin, holding her face still as their minds meshed. Claws emerged and began to dig into her skin.
Elizabeth gasped as she watched her skin begin to redden and bruise. Stop, she whispered in his mind. It was a single note of quiet in the storm raging within him, but he heard her. The claws relented, releasing her skin before puncturing it. John abandoned his seat on the floor, immediately pacing the room like a caged animal. Elizabeth just collapsed, sagging forward on her arms as her muscles refused to hold her upright.
Elizabeth stretched and rubbed her jaw before forcing her head up. There were tears in her eyes but she could still see John's guilt written across his face.
The intercom crackled on the wall. "You okay in there?" Cameron asked patiently from the hallway.
"I'm fine," she called to the door and held up a hand quickly. As long as she could still wave, Cameron wouldn't worry.
"This isn't safe," he warned with a growl just under his breath. "One of these times I'll..."
Rolling her head across her neck, Elizabeth just smiled sheepishly. "Let me scramble your brain?" she teased with an easy confidence she didn't feel. "It's all right, John. I haven't officially tried to do anything this intimate with someone else's brain and if it doesn't work, McKay might be able to come up with something that works."
John crossed to her and reached down. With one hand on her arm and the other around her waist he lifted her effortlessly to her feet. Adrenaline was still coursing through his veins like hot water, but he was gentle with her now. "You make it quiet," he admitted softly, unable to look at her. "I can feel you in here." He tapped his head and stared at her in astonishment. "You're so still."
"Never feels that way to me."
"It's nice," he offered shyly still holding her to him before he abruptly released her. "Goodnight, doctor." John headed for the door and knocked twice before the heavy metal door swung open to let him out.
Elizabeth waited a moment in the empty bay. "Goodnight, John," she called to his retreating back. Her feet still weak beneath her. She wanted to tell herself she was just tired from the strain and that it had nothing to do with the way it felt inside of him.
Four hours later, Cameron found her in the mess, clinging to a cold cup of tea. "They make that fresh, you know," he teased as he sat down beside her with a cup of warm milk.
"I'm sorry?" Elizabeth responded blankly as she stared at him. John was starting to dream and she could feel his thoughts stretching through the thread still connecting them. She'd thought about trying to shut it down, but it was getting easier the longer she stayed with him. She couldn't help wondering if she might be able to build a tolerance to his way of thinking and make it easier to share his mind.
"Nothing," her partner insisted as he smiled. "The marines didn't have to intervene today," Cameron offered cheerfully. "You're making a lot of progress."
"Once in the last week where the marines don't have to burst in and save me isn't much progress," Elizabeth sighed over her tea. Taking a sip, she realized it was cold but instead of getting up, she drank it anyway. "I can't read the minds of animals, but I can't help thinking that's what it's like. Being inside of a predator is a strange feeling."
"Try profiling serial killers," Cameron teased lightly as he studied the dark circles under her eyes. "Is it going to work?"
"Yes?" Elizabeth ventured hopefully. "It is getting easier--"
Hands slid over her back, creeping down to her waist before they slipped beneath her simple blue t-shirt and started to pull it up.
Jumping slightly, she spilled her tea as she shot up from the table. "Sorry," she recovered quickly. "Someone's dreaming."
"Swear it's not me," Cameron replied winking as he got up for a towel. "Anything good?"
Lips crept up her stomach, working their way to the bottom of her breast before the teeth teased her flesh. She could taste the sweat and excitement on Elizabeth's skin.
Elizabeth felt herself begin to flush in embarrassment but she forced herself to focus on helping Cameron clear up the mess.
She felt teeth run over her breast, simultaneously sharing the sensation of the touch with John’s lips. Smelling her shampoo as she felt the phantom hands glide over her neck was entirely bizarre. Her lips kissed and were kissed all in the same moment.
Cameron's hands worked over the table and after a moment he had wiped the spilled tea clean. He turned on his heels, dropping the towel in the sink before he turned back. When he swiveled around, she was waiting for him. Elizabeth remembered sex in the kitchen more than a few times when they were together. It was that memory of a wilder time of her life her brain ran to for a reference point. She and the John in her head wanted so badly she ached, feeling she'd starve and die empty. Filled with a predatory lust that wasn't hers, Elizabeth cornered Cameron.
In her mind, John nibbled her neck like ripe fruit before crushing her lips with his. In reality, she grabbed the back of Cameron's head and looked through John's eyes. Her lips parted wetly as she moved in. She saw her tongue dart behind her lips as she stood on her tiptoes to get closer to Cameron. His mouth tasted of milk and spice and Cameron kissed her back for a moment before he realized what he was doing.
"Elizabeth," Cameron protested in surprise.
"Elizabeth," John growled in excitement.
"Stop!" she demanded both of them as she dropped Cameron's face and pulled back. Her body was singing, humming with the energy of John's dream. In her mind, she saw herself surrendering, conquered by his lust, but she shared his victory. Her body stiffened with tension and begged to be touched. Her skin cried for the friction of palms against it and she shared his need.
"Hey," Cameron started, trying to reach her as she backed away.
She growled a second before she lost herself in John's desire and pounced on Cameron. John's want was so potent that she couldn't force it away. Hell, she didn't want to. She was unleashed; free from giving a damn and strong enough to do whatever she pleased. Her fingers were less effective than John's claws but she tore Cameron's shirt from his chest as effortlessly as John ripped hers in her mind.
Emboldened by John's strength, Elizabeth let go. Cameron's mind welcomed her home as John's dragged her in. Spanning both minds, she lost herself in the torrent. She wanted to scrape her fingers down Cameron's chest, feel John's muscles beneath her hands, cup her breasts and crush them to her chest. She knew Cameron was the one who wanted to take his time. John was urging her lust, filling her mind with vivid imagery. She was caught between, nearly overwhelmed as John's lust fed her own and leaked into Cameron's mind like the overflow from a dam.
For a moment, she was back in the familiar landscape of Cameron's mind, seeing herself through his eyes. That moment grew, and as Cameron, Elizabeth saw her pupils shift, becoming golden slits for a split-second as she crushed his lips again. Her tongue pushed his aside and toyed with the inside of his mouth as she sucked his upper lip. In spite of his better judgment, Cameron felt her body grind against his and his blood began to run hot in his groin. He'd kissed her before but this was different. It felt like Elizabeth, but it wasn't her as he'd known her. She was greedy, more passionate.
Elizabeth rushed into his mind like a flood, breaking the last of the dam between them. He'd never tried to keep her out before, but this time she was like a new person. There was a deep hunger in her mind, an insatiable lust that seeped into his body; making him contemplate stripping her right there in the kitchen and knocking her back to the table. Her body had matured, her arms were tighter and there was a different technique to her kissing. She demanded more of him. She wasn't just kissing him; she was devouring his soul and he wanted to let her. He wanted desperately to knock her back against that cold steel table and remember why she'd been so important to him.
Her hands were already on his pants and his belt buckle was coming undone. He should say no. He should put a stop to it, shake her out of it, but he couldn't. She was seeping into his mind, taking him over. Cameron didn't remember making love to her this way. Kissing her was something he still remembered. She'd been so young when they first got together. He'd felt her grow and change while she shared his bed. He was used to the differences, but this was insane.
Cameron's hands were begging to touch her, demanding that he run them over every part of her skin so they could learn what she felt like, but he knew. He already knew. He felt like he was kissing her for the first time, and something about that just wasn't right.
"Elizabeth," he tried to stop her before she stripped him of his pants. "This isn't you, is it?"
For a moment, she just stared at him, hair falling lose over her shoulders and her breath coming in desperate panting. She was wild, worse than she'd been during the most stressful parts of her university career and no matter how much he wanted to strip off that damp blue t-shirt, he couldn't.
"I've never felt like this," she growled as she dropped his pants from his hips and insinuated her leg between his. Elizabeth pulled him closer, digging her hands into the remnants of his t-shirt and pulling it taunt enough to rip it off. "I want you," she rasped gutturally as she ran her hands over his sides and up to his chest. "I can't get you out of my head."
"This isn't you," he repeated as he held her against him. "God, I'd love it if it was. Don't get me wrong," Cameron sighed and let it go. "But think of the paperwork," he whispered as he stroked her hair.
Shaking her head slowly, Elizabeth pulled herself partly out of John's dream. She could taste Cameron on her lips and for the first time since it started, she realized she wasn't John. Elizabeth still couldn't shake it out of her mind. She'd been outside her mind looking in with a raging lust for herself that still left her weak. Touching her lips, she remembered what they felt like from within and tried to reconcile how it felt to fantasize about kissing herself. Shivering suddenly, she shook her head.
"I should go," she started shakily, too confused to explain more than that.
"Are you going to be all right?" Cameron asked concerned, trying to ignore the fact that his pants were around his ankles. Another moment and he would have had her naked and riding him like a Texas bull. Damn. He really hated being the good guy sometimes.
"Yeah," she murmured sheepishly. "Look, I didn't mean..."
Cameron shut her up with a kiss on the forehead. "You're gorgeous," he whispered patiently, with only the barest hints of a smug smirk. "You were gorgeous then and you're completely exceptional now, but you're not for me."
She blinked again and forced her mind away from the thought of John's hands on her back, running up and pressing in just beneath her shoulder blades. Dragging herself out of John's fantasy, Elizabeth tried harder to distance herself. Shaking her head Elizabeth looked into Cameron's gentle smile, remembering the quiet of her mind back before her mutation. "I think I'm going to bed," she offered softly squeezing his shoulder, "before I get into any more trouble."
"Your bed or his?" Cameron teased as he watched her head for the doorway.
She stopped short and realized Cameron knew about John. Elizabeth let the silence linger for a moment as she probed his gentle amusement. Somewhere beneath it there was the faintest hint of jealous that reminded her they'd always be just a bit closer than friends. "I thought we'd already covered that," Elizabeth replied over her shoulder as she projected her hope.
Cameron let himself smile openly. "Am I looking the other way then? Again--"
"Goodnight, Cameron," Elizabeth retorted as she disappeared from view down the long corridor of the ship.
Cameron watched her go for a moment and sighed before he wiped his lips on his hand. They'd be bruised and it had been awhile since he'd felt as good and as used as he did at that moment. It was lonely nights like this one that he missed Vala and her insatiable appetite. Sighing as he started back towards the table, he completely forgot that his pants were around his ankles and his shirt was destroyed until he tripped. Falling face-first towards the table he caught himself just in time to hear footsteps in the corridor.
"Long night?" Ronon asked before he cracked a wicked smile.
"You have no idea."
Elizabeth took the deck back to her quarters. The ocean hissed away beneath the bow of the ship. They were still two days out from Tristan da Cunha, which was the last stop before the temple site. Wrapping her arms tightly over her chest, she filled her lungs with the briny air.
Cameron's mind was quietly amused. She could feel the gentle release that came when he was laughing. Elizabeth stayed in his mind for a moment and relaxed in the familiar. The stars were coming out through the low-lying clouds and she reminded herself she could join John in bed. Smirking at herself as she ducked below deck, Elizabeth rolled her head over her neck and contemplated a cold shower.
As she started to undress for bed, John's mind whispered into hers again. His mind was more organized now and the image of her in his mind was clearer. Elizabeth listened as he marveled curiously at her presence in his thoughts. John had become used to the duality of his mind and the beast within. He'd hadn't noticed the lingering connection and hadn't realized he was projecting.
Tentatively reaching for her as if he was fumbling for her hand in the dark, John offered his memory of a cherished football game and his fantasy of dodging tackles on the long run to the goal.
Elizabeth replied by filing in the grass on the field and the sound of thousands of screaming fans.
John concentrated and added a double row of cheerleaders to the fantasy. As he walked her over to them, Elizabeth realized the leader had her face. Laughing mentally, she brushed aside the image but left the door open between them.
John pulled back and Elizabeth wondered if it was all too much, too fast.
Sighing heavily, she reached for her t-shirt and started to pull it over her head. John's mind immediately tried to sever the connection. Guilt and embarrassment reverberated through the space between them.
She stopped moving. "It's nice to be appreciated," Elizabeth teased gently as she toyed with the hem of her shirt. "Besides," she continued with a bravado she didn't know she had, "no one has to know--"
He sat up in bed, and Elizabeth could feel the sensation of cold air on the bare skin of his chest. John was naked beneath the blankets of his bed and he offered himself up to her mind's eye. Even his mind was quiet, stripped bare of pretense and still hungry for hers.
Elizabeth made the first move and pulled her shirt up over her head. Her t-shirt fell to the floor as John reached for her bra. Elizabeth undid the clasp on the back and dropped it onto her shirt. She could feel the ship's engines through the deck plating and the rhythm comforted her. Closing her eyes, she undid her pants and slipped them off her hips.
John helped her drag them down, racing to get them off of her ankles as he knocked her back to the bed.
Elizabeth lay there and stared up at the steel beams of the ceiling. Her hands ran up her stomach and paused on the beginning of her rib cage.
"This is insane!" she chastised herself as she got up to put on her pajamas. John imagined being in the room with her and smelling her arousal in the air. There were dimensions of scent she'd never experienced and what he knew from her pheromones nearly rivaled what she could feel with her mutation. He knew she was hesitating but he also knew how much she wanted him.
Elizabeth conceded control of her hands to John, letting him persuade her fingers to brush over her hips and across the red cotton of her panties. She wanted them off, but John didn't bother. He slid his thumb across her stomach and slipped his fingers across her clit, teasing it with the rough cotton.
Elizabeth fell back to the bed. Forgetting the hard mattress beneath her, she let go. Insinuating herself into his mind, she asked for his hands. "I want--" she whispered both aloud and in his head. With Elizabeth sharing his control, John's hands dove beneath his own blankets. He was more than ready to be touched.
He slipped around the seam and inside her panties. John ran Elizabeth's finger slowly over her clit before he found his way inside of her.
John thrust into his hands, writhing on his bed as she pushed him towards release. She was too hot from her interlude in the kitchen with Cameron to bother taking her time, but John wouldn't let her speed up.
He kept her fingers slow and methodical as he worked her into insanity.
Elizabeth could barely keep herself from screaming at the ceiling in frustration. The change in him cut through her building orgasm. John's mind invaded hers, filling her with the sensation of naked, primordial superiority. When he came in his hands, he shared the rush of release with her. Her own orgasm followed in quiet peace of his satiation. The beast was content. The beast was quiet.
As she panted to catch her breath, Elizabeth realized the beast was hers.